The Carchat

Click on the photo to read Autocar's story about Proton's announcement on the future of Lotus. Gone is Colin Chapman's philosophy of lightness and simplicity, and in comes aspirations of selling fancy, upmarket, luxury £100,000 cars. There are even plans to introduce a city car - Aston Martin's Cygnet is surely crass enough, but at least it's based on the fairly marvellous Toyota iQ. A Proton Lotus city car? Don't make me retch.

I posted some thoughts many months ago about the Elise facelift - positing my opinion that Lotus seems to think it's Ferrari - all but confirmed by the latest announcements. And of course, Michael posted this story last month about Lotus' ideas for lightweight cars in the future. Clearly a pamphlet of lies.

Thing is, we already have a Ferrari. From Italy. A Ferrari from Malaysia is going to take a while to become quite as glamorous and exciting, why not stick with 50 years of heritage from being Lotus of Norfolk? The problem for Lotus has been a lack of investment for years, not of engineering nous and a great philosophy. So many cool concepts and ideas have not come to fruition - where's the new Esprit, a sportier grand tourer to rival the Rapide?

With not even the merest hint of melodrama, it's a sad day, methinks.

An elegant solution to a problem I've often wondered about - what if two countries are next to each other and they drive on different sides of the road? We have avoided it in the UK by doing trains in the Channel Tunnel, but I don't know if there are many landlocked countries that do actually have this problem.

I understand that most people used the left side of the road because it was the most practical if you carried a sword and were right-handed. Napoleon apparently changed the practice because he was left-handed, but another explanation is that the aristocracy used to thunder past the peasants, leaving them on the right side of the road. Come the revolution it was in your best interests to join the peasants on the right.

In any case, after that it was all a case of who could colonise the fastest from there. Interestingly - India, Bhutan, Nepal and Swaziland are all among the countries who still drive on the left.

And as bridges go, this one is quite handsome...

So the former Toyota F1 team principal thinks that F1 has become too out of touch. I don't think I've ever heard of him though, I hope that's not too elitist.

It's nice that the chap is still giving the justification for suddenly cutting and running a go, but if I'm honest I don't think I noticed that all the manufacturer teams upped and went whenever they did back some time ago round about that time the thing was doing the stuff. In the same way you don't notice when a dullard leaves a party.

Fair enough if F1 doesn't allow a manufacturer to get in touch with its customers in the way that it'd like to - but that's what dealerships are for. Elitist is said here like it's a bad thing - I don't want to watch tractors racing between bales of hay, I want to see a glamorous, enclosed world full of people I want to think I can be but never will.

But it's like Groucho Marx said - I never want to be a member of a club that will let me in.

I'm not always a fan of the CG photos of upcoming cars, but I can see that they have a place in a news weekly to promote sales. Will this car look like this? Probably not, but it's a mildly interesting glimpse into the future.

I'm fascinated by the controversy over BMW ditching their rear-wheel drive cars in favour of front-wheel drive numbers - obviously they're not the ultimate driving machines anymore, but I did wonder what Car Chat readers thought about it all.

My biggest concern about BMW is that it must be reaching saturation point with its model range - how many funny little cars and horrid big cars can the market take?

Fun times - Spyker have finally sealed the deal with GM and have adopted Saab. Who knew it was still a thing? I thought they'd bought the company ages ago, and even then I was bored. But no, it turns out they were scratching about the back of the sofa for more money and hatching plans for new cars. A brand spanking new 9-5! A new 9-3! A MINI rival! I am positively thrilled.

I give it 18 months.

I know that things have been up in the air at Lotus of late - lots of people coming and going, and as Steve Sutcliffe mentioned in his Autocar column this week, the chief exec of Lotus since last July has been Ferrari's former marketing head, Dany Bahar, and they've poached among other people, former design chief Donato Coco.

They've started an F1 team - although whether that's more closely aligned to Lotus or Proton is up for discussion - and they've got a raft of new models coming over the next couple of years. The F1 programme is ambitious and the new models clearly intended to expand the size of the company - are they trying to position themselves as a British Ferrari?

Certainly judging from this facelifted Elise that was announced today they seem to be moving towards a Ferrari design route. This looks like a perfect entry-level roadster for the Italian company if they were ever so inclined - but is it Lotus? Less so, I think.

Interesting blog post from Matt Saunders at Autocar about how Michael Schumacher might have fared in 2009 and what we might be able to expect from him in 2010.

It's mildly scientific, but only mere conjecture - we know that Schumacher is a massively quick driver and takes cars to places that other beers can't reach, but numbers and statistics are not weapons in themselves, merely bullets; you can point them wherever you like.

Having said that, it's not hard to imagine that he could have found 23-odd seconds over Rubens Barrichello at many races last year - and there were times in Button's championship campaign where he drove in a distinctly un-Schumacher-like manner. Michael lives for the win, the records speak for that - looking back isn't necessarily helpful, but it does whet our appetites nicely for what's to come...

According to an interview with a Porsche official published in Autocar, Porsche is looking for ways to decrease its CO2 footprint and is considering a turbocharged three-cylinder for its next generation Boxster model.

The head of the Boxster model line, Hans-Jurgen Wohler, told Autocar that the next Boxster model may come with a three-cylinder turbo producing somewhere between 180 and 200 hp. That would take the models CO2 emissions down to about 180 g/km.

Wohler said that Porsche is looking for ways to reduce emissions, given VW's acquisition of the luxury sports car maker last year. "We are under a great deal of pressure from the EU law makers to reduce emissions, but we don't know yet how much we'll have to come down by," he added.

Question for Porsche: What's less expensive, engineering a new powertrain and potentially tarnishing your brand image with a three-cylinder Boxster or simply discontinuing your (cash cow) CO2-heavy Panamera and Cayenne models?

You've got to love Bernie Ecclestone, the man's hilarious. The Prince Phillip of motor racing.

His Christmas card this year, revealed by Autocar, shows outgoing team bosses sailing off into the sunset waved off by the remaining chaps. Sharks are circling and Flavio Briatore waits on the side with a rocket launcher. Ecclestone himself, meanwhile, stands by on the beach in the lifeguard hut, ready to save anyone in peril.

Merry Christmas, Bernie.

It's kind of nice, but I never thought I'd ever profess to missing that Bangle chap.

The side and rear three-quarters are quite beautiful, but I'm not enamoured with the front end. I'd hold my verdict until I saw it in the metal but everyone will be bored by then. I'm nothing if not instantly judgmental...